Spotlight: Viral Videos

Hey, Saturday Night Live!  I have a funny comedy sketch idea for you!  What if Hillary Clinton, John Edwards, and Bill Richardson and other Democrats went to a Halloween costume party?  And their choice of Halloween costume directly related to their Presidential campaigns!  Funny, right?  Right? Damn, you guys beat me to it.  With some timely jokes about Bill Clinton's sexual proclivities, even!  But I must say that I'm impressed, because you also worked in Barack Obama, wearing his Sexy Barack Obama costume.  Well-played, SNL.  Well-played. 

Zombies are a growing concern for the modern American, so we can't help but feel thankful towards Lee and Sachi LeFever's The Common Craft Show. By using a style called "papercraft" to literally illustrate the ways in which one can identify a zombie and escape their unceasing onslaught, the LeFevers are providing a much needed public service. Watch it now. Before it's too late...

It's tempting to write this post as a series of random Jack Bauer facts (which are funnier than I could ever manage). But why bother? This trailer for the new season of 24, so kindly and gently introduced by Kiefer Sutherland, does all the work for you. Jack Bauer does not negotiate. Jack Bauer does not regret. Jack Bauer's gonna torture a bitch. And Jack Bauer is gonna enjoy it.

The Internet is a vast and scary place, but so full of potential.  But tapping into that potential can be daunting.  If only there was some sort of handy guide for the Internet's use! Fortunately Gabe and Max are here, with "Gabe and Max's How To Get The Dreamlife of Your Dreams Using the Internet."  Watch this video, and then fax these gentlemen your email address.  Soon, you will have the answers to the secrets you need. 

Talent is a funny thing. You can't define it, can't label it -- but you damn well know it when you see it. I'm not saying Snowball the Dancing Cockatoo is any sort of contender for So You Think You Can Ballroom Dance With a Famous Person? But if there was a reality show about birds who like to dance to the Backstreet Boys, Snowball would dominate.

This is perhaps the very definition of a situation getting out of control. Here, Ellen Degeneres pleads with the operators of a dog rescue organization to return a puppy she'd given to the family of her hairdresser. (It turns out that because Ellen had given the puppy instead of keeping it herself, dog-rescue organization Mutts and Moms had the right to take the puppy back to the shelter.) Ellen's in tears as she literally begs the rescue shelter to take pity on those poor kids... I don't think I've ever felt so uncomfortable watching Ellen Degeneres before. And I saw Mr. Wrong. Since this plea went nation-wide, though, Mutts and Moms has received death threats: "hate e-mails threatening them with lynchings, bombings of their home," according to attorney Keith Fink. DEATH THREATS?  Jeez louise.  These people rescue puppies for a living, guys. Let's just all calm down. Like Diane Sawyer (always a touchstone in irrational times) says, "There's got to be some sort of rational compromise."

Jake Gyllenhaal, when asked if he knew "what he was sitting on" when he was filming the gay cowboy romance Brokeback Mountain, doesn't quite know what to say.  Why can't he spit out an answer?  Why does he seem to be swallowing his words?  Well, he isn't sure about exactly what he was sitting on.  He just knows that it was big.  And hard.  And it went on for a long time... Oh, stop looking at me like that.  You were thinking it, too.  Okay, okay!  Sorry to get all Michael Scott over here.  But when Meredith Vieira sets me up with an opening like that (on The Today Show, of all things!), I find myself unable to resist.  

Linkin Park, oh, I suppose I've missed you.  But what I've missed is your earnest boy-band-with-a-backing-bass sound, the uber-dramatic bridges and crescendos of synthesizers.  What I didn't miss was your attempts to be Coldplay.  I have seen Coldplay, Linkin Park, and you are no Coldplay. What I see here is lead singer Chester Bennington (seriously -- CHESTER), singing about the world.  The world is apparently bad.  You can tell, because he turns on the TV and watches the news.  Which is full of violence.  So he laces up his manly manly construction boots and leaves the house to walk around the riot raging right outside his door.  And he walks around and sings for a while, while cops point their guns and rioters run amok...  Really, it's a pretty boring riot as far as riots go.  Eventually, a car gets set on fire, and Chester sings some more about  how the world is sad and bad and all that...  And then the video ends. Some might interpret this video as having a very nihilistic message, but it's a video about hope, really.  Hope that if you stand near a burning car to sing about how the world sucks, the car's fuel line won't ignite and set you on fire.  We all gotta  hope for something, I suppose.  

This impressive re-edit of A Few Good Men's climatic Tom Cruise/Jack Nicholson confrontation might make writer Aaron Sorkin a little queasy. But it's a delightful send-up of what it's like to work in a creative advertising agency, and a great calling card for the talent behind it. Because how best to advertise yourself as a uniquely creative ad writer? Come up with a unique approach to advertising yourself, like this. So it's too bad YouTube user TysonFaller is seemingly a ghost. Hopefully, he has some plan for reaping the benefits of viral success.

By all recognized laws of pop culture, one thing is universally understood: at some point, Andy Samberg and the boys of The Lonely Island are going to find themselves facing a major-league backlash.  But for right now, they are riding high with viral success.  And bless them for it. This Digital Short actually reminds me a lot of the short films that Albert Brooks would make for Saturday Night Live during its early seasons -- but shorter, and more laced with video game references, and maybe not actually funny.  But it's really cool to see a fresh comedic voice being spotlighted on national television.  It's like Saturday Night Live is almost... cutting edge.  Well.  As cutting edge as one can be with a Bon Jovi cameo. 

CBS's official description of this video is "This womans LOVES Drew Carey, and Plinko. She also really needs to use a restroom." And you know what? I can't really say it any better. Though I kind of wish that I hadn't just heard a grown woman use the word "potty" on national television. Oh, Marie. Dignity costs nothing. I had some initial skepticism about Drew Carey's ability to fill Bob Barker's shoes, and his whimpy "sorry, tell it to Roger" approach to Plinko enforcement doesn't do a lot to alter that. But Carey does score points from me when he briefly references the 1979 UK #1 "Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick," by Ian Dury and the Blockheads. Just keep referencing the obscure BritPop, Drew. And maybe you'll be okay.

Ann Coulter's anti-liberal/anti-logic/anti-common decency stance has made her one of America's most polarizing public figures (I imagine you can tell where I land on this issue). But sometimes, she crosses even the most basic boundaries of taste. In this video clip from CNBC's The Big Idea... Well. First, she dreams of a world where the Democratic party looks like Joseph Lieberman -- you know, a second Republican party. Then, she cites an episode of Seinfeld to make a sweeping generalization about mixed-race couples in New York. Then, she tells host and practicing Jew Donny Deutsch that America would be a better place without any Jews. Because in order for America to be perfect, Jews have to be perfected. Which means they have to become Christians. Because Christianity offers a "fast track to Heaven." Because Christians are, in actuality, "perfected Jews." Seriously. A friend of mine got fired from her job a few weeks ago, and that night we tried to puzzle out why she was let go. After all, she was smart, responsible, punctual, and pleasant -- what could have inspired her boss's displeasure? We tried and tried to figure it out, but eventually just gave up. "Bitch be crazy," we muttered to ourselves. "Bitch be crazy." Because sometimes, that's all you can say.

Oh, man. So it's just another Friday night and I'm lounging with my best BFFs at the the latest fabulous Hollywood see-and-be-seen (don't ask me where, please -- I wouldn't want to make you feel embarrassed). And we're enjoying some light cocktails and hard drugs when the topic of conversation turns to, as always, "Who would win in a fight -- Anakin Skywalker, Mace Windu, or Billy Elliott?" It's a pretty controversial topic of conversation, as we all know. After all, Mace Windu's got that badass purple lightsaber, and Billy Elliott has those sweet dance moves, and Anakin Skywalker's all pouty and sad... The debate wages on as usual for an hour or so, and then my friend Jill says, "Wait. Guys. What if they had the power of teleportation? What then?" And we are just like, "Whoa." Here's the trailer for Jumper, directed by Doug Liman (The Bourne Identity) and starring Hayden Christensen, Samuel L. Jackson, and Jamie Bell. The debate wages on. There can be only one.

Futurama's return from the grave has been something so long in the works that I'd forgotten it was happening. But the (self-professed) new morons at Fox have finally released a nice juicy trailer for the feature-length DVD adventure Bender's Big Score. While short on any sort of plot details, this clip does feature the elements that made Futurama great -- sci-fi parody, barely concealed nudity, and killer robots. I wasn't excited at first. But then a strangely hypnotic frog changed my mind.

As a profoundly embarrassed "Gimme More" apologist (I think it's a good song, okay?!), all of the recent Britney Spears kerfuffle has me feeling awfully torn.  After all, I like the song.  But everything that's happened in relation to the release of said song is more than a little disappointing.  And I'm including the official music video on that list.  It's not just that there's something profoundly creepy about blonde Britney Spears sitting at a bar and getting turned on by watching brunette Britney Spears shake her moneymaker.  It's also the seedy club, the uninspired pole-dancing, the weird fake arm tattoo...  Oh, good grief, she literally rubs up against the wall for the part where she says she's up against the wall.  Boo-urns.  In short -- oh, dear.  I'm still a fan, Brit-Brit.  But if you could put a little more effort in, that'd be great.  We're all saying give us more, at this point. 

In this clip from the Desperate Housewives season, Teri Hatcher, in the midst of a flip-out about her menopause diagnosis, asks to look at Dr. Nathan Fillion's diplomas to make sure that they're not from "some med school in the Philippines." Apparently, the writers of Desperate Housewives (and let's be clear about this -- the ABC primetime soap is a DRAMA, written by WRITERS, not Teri Hatcher) underestimated the ire such an offhand comment would cause. The Filipino medical community is furious and a petition demanding an apology has nearly 72,000 signatures. I would make an offhand comment about this might, just might, be a bit of an over-reaction. But, clearly, one offhand comment can get a gal into a lot of trouble. So I'll just say this -- those who think the days of political correctness are over? Hardly. YouTube just makes things a whole lot more interesting.

Because Andy Samberg and the "Dick in a Box"/"Lazy Sunday" boys at Saturday Night Live sampled the band Aphex Twin without permission, this SNL Digital Short ode to Iran President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (friend to the homosexual) has been off and on YouTube faster than a juicy Daily Show clip. But now things seem to have settled down, and we can enjoy this sweet, tender, homoerotic love song the way it was meant to be enjoyed -- illegally on YouTube.

The latest in Dove's Campaign for Real Beauty series, this blindingly fast video shows the barrage of images that assail young girls every day, just as they're trying to figure out what the hell they think of their own bodies. It's enough to make a grown woman self-conscious. Not that I'd know anything about that. It's just as effective a message as the Dove Evolution short, but the fact of the matter is that this is a marketing campaign, not a public service announcement. It's a very well-intentioned marketing campaign, but would the Dove brand be so heavily associated with these messages if it were purely altruistic? No. I'm glad that the folks at the Unilever Corporation are thinking outside the box when comes to their advertising. But it doesn't make me more likely to buy their skin tightening cream.

iPhone hackers of the world, unite! In the battle between Apple and those customers interested in modifying their super-phones, this week Apple drew some blood -- the latest iPhone update relocked any iPhones unlocked by this tutorial. So now is the time for all users to rise up -- or mash up, that is. Taking the audio from one of Apple's most inspiring (but least grammatically correct) commercials, this video tries to remind Steve Jobs & co. of a time when Apple celebrated those who "think different." Of course, I don't know where Albert Einstein would fall on issues of fair use and intellectual property, so it's a rough comparison. I also kind of wish that there were more to this video than one long continuous scroll down the third-party mods available. It kind of becomes hypnotic after a while, but that's hardly a good thing. iPhone users interested in sticking it to the man might get more use out of this video explaining how to downgrade their iPhones from 1.1.1 back to 1.0.2. Far more useful, and also far more

Kanye West's new album "Graduation" has been a critical and commercial success, going gold in a day and crushing the competition (including poor ol' 50 Cent, who may or may not actually end up retiring). In short, the man is a clear winner, which has made his recent temper tantrums about losing super-baffling. But the Kanye PR machine must be a mighty and fierce one, rivaling Truckosaurus with its cunning and ability to breathe fire. That's the best explanation I have as to how the hip-hop star got the chance to satirize his poor losing on the Saturday Night Live season premiere. It's a triumph of self-parody, simultaneously negating the bad press of his VMA hissyfit and promoting Kanye as a comedy threat. Because who knew Kanye was funny? Not me. But next time I have the opportunity, I'll definitely give "a black man -- um, a short black man -- a chance."

You are right, helpful subtitle -- they do not show us this on the TV.  But learning how, exactly, the mighty giraffe might choose to do battle with another, equally mighty, giraffe is extremely good information to have.  Short version: it involves hitting each other with their necks.  Long version: ...it involves a lot of hitting each other with their necks?  But that doesn't make it any less awesome.  Please enjoy.

What happens when you mash-up the biggest train wreck of a performance in MTV history with the bizarre viral-video rant that resulted from it?  Believe it or not, something pretty f'in' fresh. For those of you who have been off the grid for the past few weeks, on Sept. 9, Britney Spears put the final nail in the coffin that is her career when she appeared doped-up, out-of-shape, and in dire need of a lip-sync tune-up during a pathetic rendition of her new single, "Gimme More," at the MTV Video Music Awards. The very next day, Chris Crocker, a sexually ambiguous, hysterical young lad from Tennessee posted an impassioned defense of the troubled pop-tart on his YouTube page. The clip went viral -- in a very big way -- and before Crocker could say "drama queen," he had himself a reality series. It's safe to say that neither clip is an example of bonafide artistic talent. The same cannot be said, however, for this remix of the two vids by AV maestro DJ Cobra. A well-known turntablist from Los Angeles, Cobra also boasts some nifty video-editing chops. And, as the old saying goes, he's got a knack for making chicken salad out of chicken shit.

Everyone has their own way of dealing with unpleasant facts about the world.  Some of us confront them head-on.  Some of us snark about them on the Internet while doing nothing substantive to fix the problem.  Some of us drink heavily.  (Some of us do two out of three.)  But there aren't a lot of adults who admit to the "nah nah nah I don't know what you're talking about" approach.  It's fun to know that President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is one of them.  During the Iranian president's controversial Q&A at Columbia University, he was asked point-blank about the treatment of homosexuals in his country.  And apparently, it's fine -- because there are no homosexuals in Iran.  Cue the laughter of the student body.  But he's not joking.  I suppose what he actually means to say is that the openly gay lifestyle is completely non-existent in Iran, which is true. This is because persecution is rampant and public hangings of the openly homosexual are not unheard-of, given that all penetrative sexual acts between men are punishable by death. Given what that says about the state of human rights there, maybe I'll take a cue from Mahmoud, and try avoidance for a little while. 

On Swedish TV, the show must go on, even if you're blowing chunks.  Late night television presenter Eva Nazemson was hosting a phone-in game show on Sweden's TV4 Plus when a bad patch of menstrual cramps got her hurling.  Ever the professional, Nazemson stepped off camera ever-so-briefly and then returned, not only explaining herself but finishing the call she had taken before the nausea hit.  Unfortunately, the guy's answer was wrong, but at least he got to be part of Swedish television history.This article gives Nazemson's plucky perspective on the whole affair.   Something to keep in mind -- while the longest extended version of the video we found runs only about a minute and a half, the lovely-even-after-vomit Eva stayed on the air for two hours after the initial spewage.If this had been American TV, they'd have cut to commercial and had Kelly Ripa halfway home in a limo by the time Mrs. Butterworth's syrup hit the plate.  Those Swedes have a hell of a work ethic.

When Oklahoma State football coach Mike Gundy arrived at his press conference on Saturday, after his Cowboys prevailed in a wild 49-45 shootout over Texas Tech, the media  expected him to praise the effort of his student-athletes. What they got, instead, was a highly-charged meltdown directed towards the newspapermen gathered at the conference. Gundy, seething about a Daily Oklahoman columnist's scathing and cowardly attack on one of his players regarding last week's blowout loss to Troy State, delivers an impassioned speech defending the character and integrity of his kids. Yes, his "kids." During his meltdown, Coach Gundy reminds us all that when we scrutinize the level of play and the quality of character of college football players, we are skewering nineteen and twenty-year-olds. We are damaging kids, most of whom did little to deserve such malice from the local community aside from drop a pass or two on Saturday afternoon. As a nation, we obsess about sports and often ignore the "college" in college football. It's become such a financial juggernaut that we can hardly distinguish amateur from professional. We assume every player suiting up on the gridiron on Saturday is built and custom-made to eventually suit up on Sundays. We get carried away. And in the heat of the moment, we sacrifice our decency when we maliciously attack a recent high school graduate for throwing an incomplete pass. College athletes, while high profile in some cases, are not paid (allegedly). They, by and large, are not professionals expected to deal with the personal attacks that come with intense media scrutiny. This is what Coach Mike Gundy reminds us of when he courageously and correctly slays the local paper in Stillwater, Oklahoma for its highly inaccurate and cowardly "reporting" -- a term that Coach Gundy might suggest is being used loosely in this instance. It should surprise no one that Mike Gundy, after saying nothing of his Oklahoma State team's win that day, left the room to applause. I would not be surprised to see an increase in interest in Oklahoma State University football from parents of soon-to-be high school graduates, either.

Jennifer Lopez's live performance of her new single "Do It Well," on the British talk show Parkinson, is a perfect antidote to the Britney Spears VMA Music Awards disaster.  Lopez looks great, she works the stage and the crowd with cheery abandon -- and it actually sounds like she's singing live.  Sure, this video clip does lack the David Lachappelle human-sized-Habitrail touch, but when Lopez keeps the beat pumping even a cappella, we're willing to forgive that oversight. 

Is Amy Winehouse pulling a Britney Spears?  The "Rehab" singer's performance at the MOBO awards may not have been quite the trainwreck that Spears's VMA debacle was, but it was certainly enough to raise some eyebrows.Winehouse wasn't exactly helped any by the tacky she's-a-fuckup-but-we-love-her-anyway intro, but her glassy-eyed confusion during "Tears Dry on Their Own" and her mumble-mouthed incoherence on "Me and Mr. Jones" were what really sealed the deal.  Also not helping subdue the chatter were the leaked reports of her backstage rider demands: two bottles each of Jack Daniels, Rioja, and Champagne, a large bottle of vodka, and two 24 bottle cases of Heineken.Here's the thing, though: I'm all for spotting a celeb meltdown in the making, but, well, that's how Amy Winehouse always looks when she performs.  I, personally, have never seen her clear-eyed or witnessed a performance where I could understand a damn word she was singing.  She was already, at best, a bleary-eyed mushmouth, and at worst a woman in a steady drug-addled holding pattern. So I honestly don't know if she's really doing any worse than before.Which begs the question: How do you know if someone's in a downward spiral if their normal standard of behavior is so far off from, well, normal?

Behind the scenes at the Daily Reel...LIZ: Oh, hey.  Alicia Silverstone is naked in this new ad.  SPENCER: Really?  Batgirl?  Link, please.  ...three minutes later...SPENCER: Ohhhh. LIZ: What?SPENCER (disappointed): It's for PETA. LIZ: Yeah. Sorry.  SPENCER: Yeah. 

You may already know of Jake Byrd.  The goofy gatecrasher and Jimmy Kimmel Live regular has been spotted everywhere from Motley Crue's Hollywood Star Ceremony  to Paris Hilton's release.  But those who didn't already know him got a big dose this week at a press conference by Yale Galanter, OJ Simpson's attorney.Wearing an "OJ 07" T-Shirt and an "I *Heart* Famous People" hat, Byrd interrupts Gelanter to congratulate him and offer him a high five.  He continues to chime in with words of support, stopping only to resort to theatrical facial expressions in the background or -- once -- take a call on his cell phone.Who is this guy?Jake Byrd is the alter ego of comedian Anthony Barbieri.  He first started fooling fans and major news outlets when he popped up as a "super-fan" during the Michael Jackson trial, managing to convince both the New York Times and Court TV of his legitimacy.  His Kimmel segments are titled "Jake Byrd: Celebrity Avenger."I don't know if all the celebrities Byrd avenges are grateful, but Galanter, at least, seems to appreciate the support.  So when's Galanter gonna thank TDR for our High Five?

Let's make one thing clear: Despite our recent shout out to Kathy Griffin, we here at TDR have nothing against Christians or any other people of faith.  We are big fans of freedom of both religion and expression, and we are happily aware that most devout people  are intelligent, thoughtful, reasonable folks.   That said, what the hell is the matter with new The View host Sherri Shepherd?  It is one thing to not believe that you and your loved ones spontaneously evolved from muck via some sort of wacky biochemical accident.  It is a whole other thing to not only state, "I don't believe in evolution, period," but to not have a stance on whether the Earth is flat or round.Presumably, Whoopi introduced the topic, thinking Shepherd's answer to, "is the Earth round or flat" would be a definitive "round," thereby leading to the question of where a person of faith draws the line as to what scientific "facts" to accept.  Instead, Shepherd replies, "I don't know."  Not because of her faith, though, it seems.  Simply because she's never thought about it.  And not only has Shepherd never thought about it -- not once, in forty years of life -- but apparently should she ever decide the issue is important enough to resolve, she'll be going to the library for the answer.  Since all those instances of sailing, flying, and, you know, ORBITING around the globe that have taken place over the last few centuries are not evidence enough for her to suss it out on her own.Wow.  Just... wow.